I write this inform, not to alarm.

Bees gathering nectar. A reminder that there is still sweetness in my life.

On Friday 1st May (May Day) I lost the sight in my right eye. It was sudden. I was at the gym and at first thought my vision was blurred by sweat. Later when I left the gym I realised I couldn’t see out of my right eye.

I actually put this down to being tired and determined that a good breakfast and a bit of rest would put this right. Only after a delicious breakfast of scrambled eggs and smoked salmon on toast, washed down with my favourite green tea, did I think to look up the condition on the internet.

Advice was to get to a specialist without delay, so I walked the ten minutes to the opticians who said ‘get to the eye hospital straight away.’ I took their advice, ordered a taxi and was there 15 minutes later – two hours after the initial loss.

Despite being assessed as urgent I waited 4 hours before being seen by a doctor who, after seeking two lots of opinions told me that sadly I would never regain sight in my eye. There were several things they could have done to try to help me regain my sight but they all had to be carried out within a 6 hour window and sadly I was just 15 minutes outside that window.

‘Oh,’ I said not really sure how to take it all in. ‘Has anyone ever recovered from this blockage to the artery?’ I wanted to know.

‘Not to my knowledge,’ he said, and I could see it pained him to have to be the bearer of such bad news.

I heard my voice, as though from afar say to him ‘nothing is lacking that is needed, and nothing is included that is contradictory or irrelevant. If this is in my life there must be a reason. It’s important that I find the reason for this.’

He looked at me as though the shock had been too much for me and had tipped me over an invisible edge. He went on to explain that they were baffled as to why I had experienced this blockage as I was a) too young and b) too physically fit and healthy in other ways to fit the profile for this condition. They therefore wanted to hand me over to a medical team for a full medical assessment.

Without boring you with the interim details I was referred to the HASU (Hyper-Acute Stroke Unit) at Heartlands hospital for further tests. Again, not wishing to bore you with the details all the tests came back negative, but it was deemed prudent for me to stay overnight for observations. I was offered a high dose of aspirin to begin the blood thinning process, a precaution against further blockages in the body. As I’m a little averse to medication I declined.

It’s not easy to sleep on an intensive care ward. There are hourly monitoring, other very distresses patients, and constant bleeping of mentoring machines. I used the time to meditate and to journey inward. I consulted with my higher self and my intuitive guides to find the answers to the cause of the condition and what I needed to do to put it right. I refused to accept that my sight was gone forever.

The following morning I saw the consultant who amended the earlier diagnosis. He said a few people with this condition never regain their sight, a few regained all of their sight, and all the others sat somewhere between the two extremes. So, thought I, the diagnosis has caught up with my belief.

I have been prescribed a blood thinning drug and satins – both of which carry the potential of side effects, adding complications to an otherwise healthy body.

Last night I was advised (via a message at the spiritualist church) that onions naturally perform both functions of the drugs I’ve been prescribed.

I’d be happy to hear from anyone who has experienced this condition.

Unfortunately as a result of this incident I was unable to partake in many of the activities I had planned for the weekend. I did not do my dance choreography on Friday. Did not attend my writer’s meeting on Saturday or give my presentation at the Bible study group. I did not perform belly dance and poetry at my friend’s birthday party on Sunday for which I truly, truly sorry.

I have however experienced overwhelmed love sent by so many of you. I’ve been touched by the offers of help and assistance, and the gifts of food and vitamins. Your positive energy has lifted me, kept my spirits high. It is what I crave. As I said, this is not to alarm.

I continue to look for the cause and the cure on a spiritual as well as physical level. Your continued love and positive wishes are greatly appreciated.